Post-Party Reflections [Closed to Aylee]

Though now out of the party, Ryland still found it hard to breathe and walk at the same tie. It was then that he realized he hated Wade. He really did hate his cousin. It was the sort of feeling that made his blood sting in his veins, the one that prickled at his neck and made his fingers curl up into fists he couldn't control. It was something that Ryland had experienced back at the orphanage, but he'd never wanted to experience here.

He walked through hallway, his shape being only half lit by the soft light still on, illuminating his way. He was headed to the lavatories where he hoped he could take a quick shower, even if he had to put his costume back on. He wanted to get rid of the feeling Wade was just started; the feeling of insecurity.

Ryland turned around the corner, hoping he was close enough to his destination. Taking off his mask and throwing it to the ground, he wanted to forget about the whole incident, he made his way up a corridor.

As he walked, Ryland's eyelids began to close. He became sleepy, peaceful. He walked limply, unaware of where he was going and no longer feeling insecure. It was an unfamiliar, yet welcomg feeling, one that made him feel as if he were floating towards the Pearly Gates, except it wasn't death. Death was supposed to be painful, but this...this was insanely soothing.

"Ryland!" It was the faint echoing of a familiar voice, someone he had heard before way too many times. Someone he remembered amidst the feelings of peacefullness, someone definitely worth remembering. His head managed to turn back, though his body still had trouble trying to accomodate to this new feeling. Tough the hallway was dimly lit, he recognized a figure at the distance, coming closer by the second. At last, his eyes which had acquired a new gray scale, recognized the figure. It was Aylee.

Except it wasn't Aylee. It was someone who was interfering with his plans. He suddenly became angry, all his feelings of inner peace gone. He took out his wand from his pocket, took a second to admire it's red tint, before walking towards the girl with a determination he had never had before.

"Curiosity killed the cat, Aylee." Ryland replied, his voice stronger than usual. "Have you ever heard of that?" His hand gripped the wand even tighter as he saw Aylee become defensive; it wasn't that he hadn't expected it. It was that he wasn't going to let her win. For a moment, he considered Crucio, his best option to keep her far away from him; practically scare her to death. Yet there was something that forbid him from cursing her, despite the feeling in his gut that was screaming at him to do so. He could do it, or he could kill her. Simple as that. No one would know, no one had to know. Ryland's eyes turned to the light above them, so blinding to his sensitive eyes. They had never been this way...

His thoughts and words tangled themselves in his brain, unable to come out the way he wanted them. It was an inner battle between what he knew he had to do, and what he wanted to do. He had to reach the Astronomy Tower, he had to look for something. He had to make Aylee go away. He wanted to scream so loudly that someone would come and get him, he wanted to hit something until the feeling of peace came back. He wanted to kiss Aylee. He wanted to return to the party and hang out with Darcy. He wanted so much, yet he could do so little.

"Nox." he pointed his wand at the light above them, putting it out with the simple counter spell. Turning to Aylee, who now seemed even farther apart due to the lack of light, he smiled. Tough to him the smile was normal, to the outside world this new smile on Ryland's face was wicked. It was like an animal, at least. His usually small smile was now wide and evil, something so unusual for the boy. He figured he might as well do it now that he had the chance. He didn't even bother answering Aylee's question. "Flipendo!" Ryland's suddenly deep voice shouted, a blue light leaving the tip of his wand and heading towards Aylee.

"No, you're right." Ryland's smile turned wicked again. "I can do much better." He laughed at Aylee's pain, her holding on to the wall and the look on her helpless face. "But I can't kill you." He kept walking closer to her, aware that she would attack him at any time. His footsteps echoed slightly all around them; it was a kind of walking he had never done, a kind of feeling he had never felt. Ryland saw the determination on Aylee's face. She was ready to win, but should Ryland let her? No. That's not what he had to do. He had to drive the girl away. That was it.

He smiled at her once more, right before the red light from Aylee's wand appeared in front of him. "Protego!" He casted the shielding charm, a light blue, almost transparent barrier formed between his body and the light, sending it towards his left where it couldn't harm anyone. Just like before, Ryland conjured up the same birds he always did. Except they weren't the same. His usual calm and playful canaries were now black, silky ravens. The birds flew around him until he whispered "Oppugno", when the birds flew toward her, their wings spread wide and long. He had no chance to see if his crows had done their task as Aylee quickly lit up the hallway again, blinding him for a few seconds.

Once his eyesight came back, shortly after he discovered Aylee wasn't a shadow anymore, he locked his eyes on her, "You see, I'm better than you." He walked a bit closer, holding his wand tightly, eyes open to any form of attack from her. "You have books, lectures, and homework. I have power. I have will. I have the courage to do what other's wouldn't. You, on the other hand, hide away under your bed when you don't understand something." How he knew she did such things he had no idea, he did however have a feeling he was  hurting her.

Again, his words and thoughts didn't match. It was the internal battle in his mind again, the one that told him kill her now that he had the chance, and the other one that told him she was too innocent and pure to ever have to suffer through that. Ryland twitched a little as his real thoughts began to win.

"I can't!" Ryland shouted back, his voice loud and deeper than usual. He'd rarely yelled to others, but on the rare cases he did, it was almost scary to watch him. He wondered whether Aylee felt scared or not. In a twisted kind of way, he hoped she was. It would give him a newfound sense of authority, something he'd never had because Wade had always been there to overshadow him. Or maybe he'd let himself be overshadow. The first thought he could handle, as the blame wouldn't be his. But the second one burned him deep in his chest. "Why aren't you afraid!? Why aren't you running!?" Ryland shouted again, this time sending a green lighting towards her, one that he had never seen before. Because he was shaking on the inside, his thoughts racing each other, he missed and hit the window instead, shattering it to pieces.

It hit him only seconds after, that he had casted his first dark spell. The green light was unmistakable. There was no way to deny he had casted such a thing, such a curse, that he had attempted exactly what she had dared him to do. But that was completely wrong. He didn't hate Aylee! He didn't want her to die! He liked her! What's wrong with me? A thought surfaced to his eyes, confusing passing through them, revealing his green eyes for only a flash. Ryland shook his head only in the slightest bit. He could feel a part of him getting lost in between thoughts of Aylee and Wade's hate, in between thoughts of himself and what he had just done. This was really happening.

As soon as Aylee turned off her wand, Ryland's eyes grew bigger with power. He could win this if the lights were out. He could finish it and move on to where he had to. He could do it. Ryland held up his wand, ready to attack her once more, but a bright light suddenly made his eyes burn. Aylee was flicking her wand in front of him, and away from him, multiple times. With his eyesight being lost, Ryland couldn't do anything against her disarming charm. He felt his wand slip out of his hand, landing somewhere near him but unable to tell where it was. He was being attacked with too many spells in a short amount of time.

"Stop!" Ryland said as he felt himself trip back, catching his feet by a miracle. He summoned his wand almost as quickly as he recovered. At this moment, Ryland realized he wouldn't be able to take her down with words, he had to use force. His first instinct was to do the same he had done with Wade, but he couldn't. He couldn't bear to do something like that to her. There was the twitch again.
Ryland, with wand in hand, he glared back at Aylee, this time sending a purple light towards her. This time, he had no idea what he had just casted, but a part of him hoped he had missed.

Ryland was becoming tired as Aylee kept throwing spells at him. His eyes were beginning to burn with such an intensity that he was losing his thoughts. His feelings ranged from anger to sadness, from disappointment to love. His mind was a rollercoaster. How could he feel so much and say so little? How could he stop this? He knew, deep inside him, that this wasn't him. But a part of him told him this was the new Ryland; the one that didn't care about anything. The soothing feeling from before had started once more, running through his veins like an elixir. Ryland's eyes rolled to the back, he was too confused and had no idea what he was doing now. Seeing his latest spell had missed, he sighed and contemplated the idea of simply giving up.

Don't! Show her what you can do!

Was that his voice? No, he was sure it wasn't. He'd heard it before though; it was a familiar tone, arrogant but scared. Was that...Wade? No. It was...Ryland looked down and quickly rubbed his eyes with the palm of his hands. He was losing it. His mind, that is. "Stop!" He shouted, not at Aylee but at the voice in the back of his head. It kept talking, telling him things he didn't want to hear. Do you think she won't like you if you do it? She wouldn't even like you now! It won't matter in the long run, Ryland. You can do things without people like her...your cousin was right. You can hide your filthy blood with his last name. You can do and achieve great things. "Stop. Please." Ryland wasn't even sure if his last words had been loud enough for anyone to hear him, but he knew that he had said them so quietly, so slowly. This time, he let whatever spell Aylee was using hit him.

Ryland's head was spinning, sending words and images all over him. Am I dreaming or is it real? No, it has to be real. But no dream would ever feel this way. The good feelings were back. He was, once again, walking on clouds. Placing a hand on his head, he tried to figure out why it seemed there was someone else beside him inside his head. A part of him was yelling and bossy, but the other, his real self, was confused and tired. It was as if he was battling his own darker self, a negative Ryland. Maybe I have a double personality disorder or something like it...he thought as his hand fell limply and he remained where he was, unmobile and dazed.

There was a loud voice in his head, a girl. "Get out of it!" Was he supposed to know what that meant? His eyes shone, a small hint of happiness in them, but beneath it lay confusion. He turned towards the voice, only to see a bright red light coming his way. It was then, in a split second, that the fire-red light hit him right in the stomach, a feeling of numbness spreading quickly through him and finally...nothing.

If you're unconscious, you shouldn't feel anything, right? The anterior part of Ryland's head, towards his ear, began hurting. What. He didn't even feel strong enough to ask complex questions to himself. To make things worse, the feel-good images and thoughts in his brain were long gone, highlighting his physical pain. It seemed that his sense of touch came back first, letting him feel the floor on which he was lying. The surface of the ground, rough and cold, sent small shivers through his fingertips. Later he became aware of the way he was lying, with his feet spread apart but with his right leg curled upward. His left arm was stretched a bit towards his head, with his right one closer to his face; his chest touching the floor.

Had he been knocked out this badly? Next came his hearing, which allowed him to hear someone's breathing. It was soft and almost shallow, but he could hear the small breaths and, later on, he could hear his own. Ryland's breathing was almost too loud; it was a little deeper than usual, but still shallow. His sight came last; his eyes were closed, and he could tell by the dark canvas he was looking at. It was then that he was desperate to open them up and find whoever it was that was he was with him, or near him. As the senses came back, his pain increased. His head began to thump loudly on his ear, it almost burned.

It seemed that time was playing a terrible joke on him, making him wait for his strength to come back so he could freely move. So far, his eyelids had moved and allowed to see where he was, but he apparently wasn't facing the person in the same hallway. He let out a sight, wondering when everything necessary would come back. That, and he had an intense need to use the restroom. A few minutes, or seconds as his knowledge in time was completely messed with, he was able to move his right arm fully. Helping him stand up only a fraction but enough to be able to turn his head and find Aylee. What the-? His green eyes probably let his surprise show, but then he remembered the pain on the side of his head and flinched a bit.

Ryland didn't even have time to react when Aylee was already threatening him. What the-? He saw the way she glared at him, too harshly, and he frowned a little bit. Could it be possible that one day he didn't get knocked out or hurt for whatever reason? This was too much. He raised his index finger and pointed at his chest, "I tried to kill you? As if!" Though his voice had come back, it was weak and sour. As he saw her expression soften, he couldn't help a the smile forming, which didn't leave his face as she helped him up.

"My head is burning...and I feel a bit nauseous." He admitted, returning Aylee's smile. It took him a second to analyze his surroundings; the dimly lit hallway, the broken window and the fallen ieces of glass, the pain on the side of his and Aylee's worried look. "What did I do?" Ryland groaned, unsure of how he had ended up there and why Aylee was even next to him. Not that he minded, of course.

Little by little, the strength of his voice came back. It felt great to be able to fully speak again, and to move! He was about to say the he remembered attending Wade's Halloween Party, punching him and leaving to take a shower but he soon realized he had not yet done the last of his tasks as he was still wearing his party clothes. Either way, Aylee didn't give him time to answer as she began to explain everything. So I did punch Wade. At the tought of people seeing him do so, he blushed with embarrassment and shame. He watched Aylee as she explained all the terrible things he had done, and his heart broke when she informed him he had even attempted to kill her. Actually kill her.

Dear lord! What have I done? He thought, his muggle beliefs about sinning and the afterlife coming back to him and making him hate his magical abilities. He glanced at the broken glass around them, not being able to look at Aylee anymore. Had it really come down to him losing his self control? "I'm sorry." he muttered, knowing that a simple apology wouldn't take away the damage he'd caused. He had even insulted her! Not one time, not one time, had it crossed his mind to bring up any of her faults, mainly because he didn't exactly see any of them. He sat up correctly, all his needs about using a restroom long forgotten due to shock, and looked the other way; avoiding Aylee's gaze completely. She must hate me now.

"Yeah." he lied in reply to her last question. "I feel fine." He wanted to go see the kind, grandmotherly nurse, but he didn't think it would be a good idea to explain to her what he'd done. And most likely he'd end up crying in front of her which was something he also didn't feel like doing. Ryland waited a few minutes before fully standing up and found the courage to look at Aylee directly, yet so afraid of what he would find.

As she was explaining, Aylee saw Ryland's face break down. "It's okay!" she replied immediately to his apology.  She was trying to be like her brother and be optimist. And not let the situation get to her. Problem was, it already did. Yet she didn't show it, and tried to keep her encouraging smile on as she said, "You didn't know what you were doing. It's all right." But it seemed that they both knew that everything was not all right. Even for Aylee, that night had been a shock and she wasn't exactly eager to think about the fact that she had nearly died. Once again.

At Ryland's reply to her question, she let out a loud snort and her face turned to a frown. "No," Aylee said, a bit rudely when he looked at her again. Then she smiled weakly, shook her head and said, "Don't lie. We both know that you don't feel fine. It's pointless." Then she rubbed her eyes. The effects of no sleep were now getting to her. Maybe they should both just go to their towers and go to sleep. But then, something was nagging her, keeping her awake. Curiosity, maybe.

"Are you sure you don't remember anything?" Aylee asked suddenly, frowning. Her mind went back to her previous theory. If Ryland's face looked that broken down when he learned of what he'd done- it was obvious that he'd never attack her. Then, would she be right, would Ryland have just been controlled to do things against his will? She sat up straight, her eyes no longer sleepy.

"It's not okay, though!" Ryland exclaimed, feeling angry at himself for losing control. Doing it with Wade was one thing; he was family and he'd be easily forgiven no matter what what happened between them, but to do so with Aylee... "I tried to kill you!" It was a whisper, a loud one, but he didn't know what he was doing. He was trying to figure out why he would even do such a thing to her, why he would even provoke her to get himself knocked unconsious. However, seeing Aylee's optimistic smile, he returned her gesture and allowed himself to see the brighter side of the situation...the problem was, though, that he couldn't find one.

This time Ryland let out a soft smile. Seeing Aylee's many moods with just one look was always one of his favorite things about her. The girl had one of the most expressing faces he'd seen so far. "Yeah, well, I do need to use the lavatories..." he admitted shyly, looking at his own messed up clothing. Then, he looked at Aylee, "I remember the party, and Wade saying..." he contemplated telling her, but he couldn't. "I remember punching him and leaving to try and take a shower and just clear my head...but that obviously didn't happen." He gestured to their surroundings.

"You didn't know what you were doing!" Aylee argued. Then, when Ryland spoke again, she couldn't help but ask, "And you weren't drunk, were you?" Although she was sure that students weren't allowed to slip in Firewhisky for parties, she just wanted to be sure. She scratched her forehead, and looked around. Firewhisky didn't make your eyes grey, did it? It was obvious that Ryland had no idea what he was doing. Like before, her theory was that he was controlled. Which brought her back to her thoughts... "I think..." she muttered. "I think you've been under the Imperius Curse." It all fit, didn't it? Ryland was controlled to do things against his will. The Imperius Curse was the only spell Aylee knew that could do such a thing.

Ryland almost died of laughter, though he couldn't laugh very well so he it came out as a loud snort. "No!" He shook his head, "I don't drink!" Why in the world would Aylee even think about that? He's fourteen, there's really nothing he can drink besides juices and milk. Ryland looked down and tried to stand up completely, using his arms to balance himself in case he needed it.

He heard Aylee's last theory, suddenly whishing it hadn't been her that had found him. What if it was true? It would explain what he was feeling....the happiness followed by the neverending confusion. Not to mention the voices in his head. He turned to Aylee and asked, "Does it make you feel happy? The curse?"

At Ryland's snort, Aylee let out a laugh. "Just checking!" she exclaimed, grinning. Then, as Ryland tried standing up by himself, she did the same just in case he was about to fall or something. She bit her lip as Ryland asked her a question about the curse. That moment, she was trying to remember more about it. She had read about it a long time ago, but she had never bothered to read about it again as she thought she'd never need to use it. There were a few moments of silence. "I think so," Aylee said after a few moments. Then she remembered what she already knew about the curse. "It's one of the Unforgivable Curses..." she murmured, then turned to look at Ryland. "It's illegal. That's why it's unforgivable. It's illegal." Of course, she was obviously stating the obvious. This was one of the situations where Aylee'd freeze and not know what her next actions would be.

"I know it's illegal." Ryland tilted his head to the side a little, wondering why she was stating the obvious. She was smarter than that. "Do you think maybe we should...tell someone?" he lowered his voice. There wasn't someone in specific he could tell, or wished to tell, but the question that bothered him the most was: Why would someone in school use the curse on him?

"Do you think, that if our theory is real, someone from the school did it? Or is it possible to curse someone from a distance?" he asked her, glancing towards the end of the hallway, were some students were beginning to appear, probably already leaving the Wade's party.