Explaining ze Problem

Andre was going to lunch. Because he was hungry. That was usually why people went to lunch. Ah, but wait! He couldn't go to lunch yet! I promised zat little first year zat I would explain ze situation to her professor. His very first arithmancy class ever had just taken place. It was marvelous! And a little first year, Aoife, had gotten lost and ended up in his room. He had allowed her to stay, but he had to explain why she wasn't in Charms class. So, while he was thinking about it, he changed his course and headed toward the Charms Office instead.

He only stopped once along the way - to chat with a portrait - because he had promised that kind little girl that he would help her. And he would not be distracted! He didn't even get lost! When he reached the office, he knocked and let himself inside. He'd never met the charms professor before, but apparently it was a dark-haired woman. Andre beamed at her as he entered.

"'ello zere!" he said brightly, helping himself to a chair in front of the woman's desk. "I don't zink we 'ave met. I am Andre Jean-Louis Leblanc, ze new Arithmancy professor. You may call me Andre, if zis pleases you." Was her desk mahogany? Or polished oak? It was very important to be familiar with your wood types, of course, in case of emergencies. Do not be distracted by zis beautiful wood! Zis is not why you 'ave visited zis lady!

"I 'ave come to explain why Mademoiselle O'Donnell 'as missed your class zis morning," he said, determined to explain his purpose before he forgot it. After all, the mahogany (or polished oak) desk was highly fascinating.

Andre was too excited by the Professor's use of the term Mademoiselle, beaming when she said it, to notice the sharpness of her tone. When she asked for further explanation, he leaned forward in his chair and eagerly delved into his tale. "Well," he said, placing the tips of his fingers together. "You see, I 'ad my first Arithmancy class zis morning. And when I arrived in ze classroom, I encountered ze most serious of problems!"

Andre paused to make sure that he had the woman's full attention before continuing. It was a very important story after all. "You see, ze first zing I needed to do was to write my name on ze chalkboard. Zat is what all good teachers do, of course. Only, you would not believe zis..." Pause for dramatic effect. "Zere was no chalk in ze classroom!" Pause to allow the woman to gasp. "Now, surely, you can see ze 'orrendous problem zat I was faced with."

Now to explain how Aoife had ended up in his classroom. "Just as I was losing 'ope, Mademoiselle O'Donnell appeared in ze middle of my classroom. And she tried to help me find ze chalk, because she understood ze importance of it for ze success of my lesson. But ze blasted chalk evaded me, even with ze help of Mademoiselle." Pause for breath. "Zen, she explained zat she had meant to go to charms, but had gotten lost. And I realized zat I 'ad been forgetting somezing all along! Zat I could magic ze words onto ze board! It is quite an intriguing charm, I could teach it to you if you do not know 'ow to do zis... It is rather simple if you..."

Oh, right. He was telling a story. With a point. "But of course, I must stay on ze topic. Zis is when Mademoiselle O'Donnell seemed concerned zat she would lose points if she were to join your class later zan ze others. So, I told her - and zis was quite brilliant of me, you will surely zink - I told her zat she could stay in my class, so zat she would not lose points. Because it was my fault zat she was late." Andre had finished his story! Without getting too distracted.

Beaming at the woman, he finally felt alright with letting his eyes wander back down to her desk. "Would you mind telling me if zis beautiful desk is made of Ma'ogany or Polished Oak?" He had to know.